I’ve been a single mom the whole time, I didn’t suddenly become a single mom, or get divorced or anything like that. I’ve been a single Mom since those 2 pink lines appeared on the pee-on-a-stick test. It was a choice I made then and there. So I figured I would shed some light on what it REALLY means to be a single Mom.
- There is no one there to hold your hair when you leaning over the bog-bowl when you pregnant
- You learn to position pillows around your humongous body so you can sleep better when you 40+ weeks pregnant
- There is no one there to swear at for it being their fault when you pushing a watermelon out of your body
- You follow the golden rule of sleep when baby sleeps, because there is no one to take over when you sleep deprived and forgetting to put water into your tea cup
- You learn to pee with someone on your lap or holding your leg, because busy bodies can get up to allot when you take your eye off them for 2 mins
- You discover that the (empty) bath makes an awesome babysitter for a busy body when you need to shower – it’s a contained space and busy bodies can’t escape
- You lovingly wipe the tears from your child and make sure they fall asleep in your arms before you rid yourself of the puke covered clothes, because there is no one else to take over from you.
- You live your life vicariously through your friends, because going out to you means being home before 6pm
- You don’t get to do anything for yourself before 6pm at night, nothing, because baby is still awake
- You on mommy-duty 24/7/365, you don’t get every second weekend off or a day here and there, it’s you, yourself and no one else
- When you feeling sick you have to build a bridge and get over it because little ones don’t care, they still want you to be your normal self
- You get to be mommy, the b*tch-who-won’t-let-you-do-stuff, the healer, the evil-witch-who-feeds-medicine, the comforter, the provider, the good cop and bad cop
- You become the human jungle gym at 5am and at 8am and 10am and don’t forget the odd 2am and 3am stints as well
- Coffee dates are no longer just for 2 people catching up, they are for 2x adults, 1x baby, 1x human jungle gym, 1x entertainer, 1x food provider, 1x cleaner upper and they are usually cut short because of a moment in lack of social skills from baby
- You get to put on a swimming costume and go swimming in the big pool in November *shudder* – oh heaven forbid that the sight should scare someone, it’s not a pretty sight
I wouldn’t change things for a million spa days… wait hold on, that might be pushing it a little far… ok there are a few things that I might change being a single mom for, but they would have to be right up there with a million spa days.